Should I Tell My Mother I’m Going to Rehab?
Considering rehab can be really frightening. No one is thinking about going to rehab because they are filled with clarity, wisdom and decisiveness. Most people getting ready to take this leap of faith are sick, desperate, confused, hurt and angry. Often they direct that anger at the family. It is a good question to ask: should I tell my mother I am going to rehab?
Should I tell my biggest critic/supporter that I’m a failure?
Tell My Mother I’m Going to Rehab?
Yes or No
First of all, the fact that you are open to residential treatment for your addiction is great news. It may be hard to see this now, but you are NOT a failure. Your techniques for living did fail, but that is not who you are. Should you tell your mother you are going to rehab? It depends.
There is no ‘one size fits all answer’ to family questions
There are many factors in play deciding who to tell and who not to tell you are going to rehab. Once a person knows, they can’t not know. You always have an option to tell someone later, but once you share the news, it can’t be taken back. And depending on the person you tell, they just might ‘share’ it with other people you would prefer not to know. More than one guest has gotten off their weekly phone call time with their mother, angry to find out that mother has been telling the extended family, her friends and anyone else mother thinks may have an interest.
What is your motive to tell or not to tell?
The nature of your relationship with your mother will be the best indicator of the decision to tell her you are going to addiction treatment. There is really no right or wrong answer here. For the majority of our guests at rehab, their mothers mostly feel relief and gratitude that their child is getting the help they need.
Sometimes mothers attempt to minimize the addiction, or attempt to control the rehab process itself. Commonly we hear mothers want their adult children to have treatment very close to mother’s house. If you are already attempting to buck your mother’s attempts to control, trying to please her with your choice of rehab may be impossible. Sometimes less information is more. If your mother does know, you can ask her to keep this information to herself.
Secrets vs Privacy
We hear in the rooms of recovery all the time, “we are as sick as our secrets”. We are certainly not advocating secrecy here. However, there are times when it is best to respect your privacy. After there is a strong foothold in sobriety and recovery may be the best time to share with your mom about your rehab experience.
Mom’s Involvement in My Treatment
We encourage moms and other family members that have an interest in helping their loved one recover to start working their own program of recovery through Al-Anon Family Groups or their own personal therapy.
Private, Holistic, Discreet Treatment
Consider Panama for your addiction recovery rehab. Alcohol & drug rehab abroad to get away for a whole new, fresh start at life clean and sober. Nestled in the beautiful green hills of Boquete, the air is fresh and clean. There are a tremendous amount of flowers, butterflies, and birds. It is a great place to start your recovery. Serenity Vista can help.