Not Why, But How!
Someone else can do it; why can’t I?
It’s happened to all of us: we see someone else engaging in a behavior, and we wonder why we couldn’t do it, too. In holistic rehabilitation, we start to look at things differently.
My sister can eat as much pie as she wants and doesn’t seem to get fat; why can’t I?
My friend can have just one drink without getting carried away; I should be able to do that, too.
Why shouldn’t I be able to live like everyone else?
Why should it be different for me?
It’s important to realize that just because everyone else is doing it without harm or consequence or loss of control or hurting themselves or others – does not mean that it applies to the addict or alcoholic.
Sometimes denial of this fact – the fact that the disease of alcoholism or other addiction has affected you instead of someone else; that you are in fact ‘different’ and will not ever be able to drink again safely – causes tantrums and rage. “Why me?” people cry. Why me?
It’s an understandable reaction and human response, but it’s an unhelpful one for those seeking sanity, serenity, and sobriety. Asking ‘why me’ does not lead toward recovery, because it leaves the addict/alcoholic – or anyone constantly asking that question, for that matter – in a victim mode. Instead of focusing on their own role in the addiction or behavior, instead of taking responsibility for what has happened in their lives, the victim casts about for someone else to blame. When the addict blames someone else, they cannot take responsibility for their lives, nor can they take credit for their own recovery.
A large part of 12-step programs and 12 step work is learning to realize how it’s about you: about how your decisions led to where you are, and how ultimately it can only be your decisions that will lead you out of the chaos and havoc that the addiction has wrought. Acknowledging alcoholism as a disease, the treatment for it can be guided by someone else, such as an addiction professional or treatment center, but, ultimately, it is up to the individual addict or alcoholic themselves to engage and take responsibility for their recovery.
How Do We Fix This?
Instead of asking ‘why me’, addicts and alcoholics who are serious about recovery ask ‘how do I fix this?’ They take themselves out of the victim role, admit their powerlessness over the substance, ask for help, then take that direction, working on how to change their lives, their attitudes and behaviors to create a sober, serene and peaceful existence.
The best way to do this is often a holistic rehabilitation approach: to study the defense mechanisms that trigger the addictive behavior; to learn how to deal with the problem differently, and to choose – despite the fear, the anger, and the old manner of thinking that will threaten to well up at first – a healthier action to take.
Holistic Rehab focuses on the Solution
At Serenity Vista Addiction Recovery in Panama, we can help, and know how to give the direction that will help facilitate the healing process. Using holistic rehabilitation that focuses on the mind, body and spiritual aspects of addiction and recovery, we gently help you move from asking ‘why me’ to ‘what can I do to fix this?’ Although uncomfortable at first, this new way of thinking ultimately leads our guests to a feeling of relief and empowerment. By admitting an inability to control anything but our own attitudes and realizing that we cannot change anything but our own actions, we slowly but surely build a world in which the answers are all within our reach: that what we do on a daily basis is the biggest factor in our own happiness, peace, and serenity.